Listening

Don't you love people who are good listeners? It's a skill more of us could stand to develop. In the Bailey family we joke that at family reunions we have to hire non family members to come so there will be someone there to listen. We like to talk.

When conversing one on one, most of us have developed the ability to at least fain the appearance of listening even if we are actually thinking of other things like what gem of a comment we are preparing to offer the poor schmuck across from us blabbering away about something or other. "How lucky they will be to hear what I've got to say. It will probably change their life."

When sitting in an audience however, some people don't even try to look like they're listening. Perhaps these people have never stood before a group and attempted to communicate something. If that's you, let me let you in on a little secret: That person up in front speaking...CAN SEE YOU! The last time I was in front of a group, several people looked like they were being tortured. Grant it, listening to me speak may be considered cruel and unusual punishment, but this was at a church! The least you could do is pretend to listen. You don't have to pretend to agree. You don't have to even stick around. But if you decide to stay, try not to appear like you want to hurt the person who is speaking.

Anytime someone does something live, in front of a group, it is participatory. Actors, musicians, teachers, preachers, lecturers, comedians, salespeople; they all feed off of the response they are getting from the audience. And again, THEY CAN SEE YOU and THEY CAN HEAR YOU! Applaud, boo, Amen, hiss, nod in agreement, listen with your eyes, but don't sleep through it or scowl at them and then tell them what a good job they did afterwards. It's disingenuous, dishonest and disrespectful.

Try this: Commit to listening as intently as the speaker is committed to speaking. And give them a break, it's not easy to get up there and open yourself up in front of a group of people.

Thus endeth the rant. Were you even listening?